why do i write?

I write to make sense of the thoughts bouncing around in my head.

 I write to feel connected to what I am feeling and put it to words.

 I write when I do not know what to do with hard life situations.

 I write to connect with my creator God. 

I write to hopefully make an idea that others can relate to.

 I write to inspire and put words to a feeling that people might share with me. 

I write because it releases built up anger, passion, sadness, emptiness, boredom, joy, and fear. 

I write to be understood and to understand myself.

 I write to break down my walls.

 I write to improve myself and to challenge myself. 

I write to express myself artistically. 

I write to make sense of the world and my reason for being in it.

 I write to avoid feeling trapped or alone.

 I write to escape my world for a moment and reflect on it.

 I write when I feel bare.

 I write when I feel full of life. 

 I write when I have no words and no desire to speak to anyone.

 I write when I have too many words left unsaid.

 I write to isolate myself and I write to comfort myself. 

I write to create something, anything. 

I write as someone who is walking aimlessly, trying to figure out where they are going, where they find themselves in the present moment, and what soil they find their feet planted upon.

“ I write to tie my heart back together” - Karen Sorensen-Lang 

short speculation

One who feels all the emotions that life entails will be subject to change constantly-- good and bad, significant and minor. Nevertheless, feeling is vulnerability, and hell, something life-altering will be sure to come out of doing so

I Got U- Sweater Beats

** HOME SWEET HOME! **

Christmas break was one for the books! Here are a few pictures to wrap up my amazing time spent back home! 

 Explorin' LA at Space Twenty 15 

 the bestest of friends together again!

 LA trip to the beautiful 6th street bridge! 

The LAB Antimall - Costa Mesa

Cousin time at San Clemente

Our new beach house backyard!

being silly at sunset 

reunited with my Iranian roots! 

christmas time-- jolly as can be

Vantage Pointe photo shoot!

The Gypsy Den, Anaheim -- amazing cafe!

stumbled upon this! so awesome

Ringin' in the new year DJ style

long awaited Disney trip!

explorin' abandoned hiding places 

lovely reunion with my roommates!

teach me how to love

today I was reminded of how Jesus entered our world

through the most humblest of ways, Jesus came from nothing.  

He did not make some grand entrance proclaiming His power

He came to this earth in such a way that people could not dare say to Him, "you don't understand."

He was birthed by a nobody, in the middle of nowhere, with few people knowing of His birth. He lived His life under constant ridicule and betrayal, yet sinless, and His life on earth ended in one of the most cruel deaths, with everyone around Him treating Him like garbage.

All so that God could say in return, "Child, I do understand you, i've experienced it too."

I realized this today and found myself caught in a situation where I just didn't know what the hell to do. I didn't know how to handle what was going on in my life and didn't have a solution

When I thought about what christ endured throughout his lifetime, my frustrated question of, "God you don't understand, why is this happening to me?", quickly changed to, "God, what did you do in situations like this?"

Although I haven't figured out all the answers, I figured out the source to turn to for them.

I've simply asked Jesus to teach me. Teach me His ways, teach me how He had tons of people flock to Him and as a result walk away changed.

I've asked Jesus to teach me how to love.

I've experienced firsthand that I am an inadequate, flawed, and lost lover. I need to learn from the one who IS love how to love. 

So that is a journey I am embarking on, to learn how to love. Not only others, but myself as well. 

Show me how to love without ceasing and circumstance, so that people might come to know you through me

I was bitter, I was jealous, I could not put up a fight
I was lost, I was fake, I couldn't stand not being right
At the end of it all, I had paid quite the price
and more importantly, I realized, I just wasn't very nice