where i find myself

i don't feel like myself lately

but, to be honest, i cannot pin point a collection of words to describe "who i am" anyways

in roughly a week i undergo a familiar transition that will definitely put my identity to the test

im not too sure how i feel about this change but i know full well that change is good in itself

i do know that i feel stagnant-

i feel unacquainted with the ground i walk on 

i feel fat

i feel tempted to do bad things

i feel torn between ways of living

i feel like being honest -- brutally honest

i feel a slight connection to my spirit and my savior

i have lots of questions

i have plans to get away

i have a yearning to know the depths of agape 

i have dreams of connecting with people that are a million miles away

i have a fascination with the moon

night > day

read this on Elite Daily today & loved every word; take a read ---

"The moon is for things unseen, things done in the shadows and beneath the fog. Under bridges and beneath bed sheets — it’s for wild hearts and unconcerned minds. It’s where plans are made in dark alleyways and secrets revealed under the soft haze of light coming through the cracks of closed shutters.

It’s when fugitives escape and kids run away. It’s when girls lose their virginities on torn leather seats and boys get into trouble. It’s when the suffering take their lives and the lonely seek comfort.

It’s when we fall in love — that passionate, all-consuming, purposeful love that always looks a little different in the light of day.

The night is for passion. It’s for fanaticism, romance and trouble. It’s when your most tender, authentic and suppressed sides come out to play under the nonjudgmental eyes of the stars."